How Much Should You Spend on a Wedding Gift?
The average bridal gift registry tops $5,000 in merchandise, a bridal registry survey from WeddingChannel.com and TheKnot.com revealed. These rules generally hold true even if the wedding is a destination event or if (heaven forbid) the couple getting married declined to give a gift at your wedding. Proper wedding etiquette is about you doing the right thing and not about sticking it to your pal for a five-years-ago slight. If you are on a budget and cannot afford to spend the amount suggested, do the best you can.
If you’re in the wedding party…
If you are part of the wedding entourage, the same rules apply as if you are a family member or close friend of the couple. That said, some brides do put their wedding attendants through a lot. If you have put in a major amount of time and energy into the wedding, for example, if you wrote calligraphy for 200 invitations, consider your time a donation of sorts and give a smaller gift than if you haven’t done much for the wedding. However, as a wedding party member, it is your duty to help the bride and groom get ready for the wedding, so be honest with yourself here.
If you’re related to the couple…
If you’re a relative who’s funding the wedding, your actual wedding present may be smaller than if you’re a sibling or other non-contributing family member. In general, you’ll want to spend more than $100 (and likely closer to $130 to $140) on gifts for other family members.
If you’re a friend…
If you’re a friend, use your discretion on what to spend but know that most pals pitch in around $70 for a wedding gift. If you’re invited to multiple wedding events, determine how much you feel comfortable spending for the entire wedding and parcel the money out to an engagement gift, a shower gift, a wedding gift and your share of the bachelorette party, if invited. Leave the largest portion for your wedding gift. This way, you won’t overspend along the way and you’ll still end up with something nice for the wedding.
If you’re a distant friend, third cousin, coworker or other…
If you’re in this category, you can spend less on the gift than you would if you were closer to the pair. As a general rule, spend about $50 on the gift and select one nice gift or several small items from the registry. If you’re friends with others in this category–for example, if five of you from the office are going to a co-worker’s s wedding–consider pooling your money and getting one of the larger gifts off the registry such as the one of the Macy’s items like the Keurig coffee machines. Over two-thirds of brides register for big-ticket items in expectation of guests splitting the cost, so this is perfectly legit.
If you can’t attend…
If you cannot attend, you’re still expected to send a gift as long as you were invited to the actual marriage ceremony. If you were invited to an engagement party but no ceremony, for example, gifting is optional. Use the criteria above to select the best gift for you.
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Category: Family Finances, Holidays
